dancing 'baby goat'

When asked what we wanted to do in Greece I responded with "drink lots of ouzo!" My response was quickly followed by Mark's response, "AND ZORBA!". Yes, Mark thought Zorba was a drink. Once he found out it was in fact a Greek song and dance, the rest of the holiday somehow consisted of all kind of dancing EXCEPT Zorba. It happened mostly around The Acropolis. You'd think we would have been there for the site, but in truth it was a great dance space.

This 2 minute video highlights some of my dancing moments around Greece (with a dash of salami singing.)

My stage name 'baby goat' came from a local lady who saw me prancing around and called me a baby goat.

Fringe, minge, farts and other stories for adults

I fell in love with Scotland pretty much since I knew Paolo Nuttini existed. In truth it was secretly because of Stuart Anderson…

Actually, I have Scottish blood, so that could have a lot to do with it. Needless to say I was beside myself to be hopping on a plane to Edinburgh a few weekends ago. I expected acres of green grass, chilly weather, tasty whisky, clacky Scottish accents and of course lots and lots of gorgeous Scottish men! I got all of that and more as my time there coincided with the Edinburgh Fringe Festival. 

A slut of a festival, boasting hundreds of shows in all types of genres for all types of people. We wasted no time and kicked off our weekend with our first show hosted by none other than Mr Methane from Britain’s Got Talent.

Being very open about our eagerness to  pass wind, Dennis and I were elated to meet the man behind the mask who holds the record for the longest fart. Mr Methane is a surprisingly charming man with a great sense of humour and a unique talent to pass wind to any tune.

<Spoiler alert! His farts do not smell.>

He told us the tale of how he got into his career, the flack he had dealt with and how he brews up his farts for his performances. The acoustics were nothing short of amazing and Dennis and I were pleased to get front row seats. My favourite part of his show was when he farted The Crystals ‘da doo ron ron’ All in all Mr Methane’s show was not only different but wildly inspiring.  

Mr Methane’s show was held in a pokey book store called Bob’s Books. The owner was a pudgy, although strangely sexy on account of his humour, bearded man. He suggested we stay for the next show which was his comedic skit of stories from when he managed world tours for the likes of Snoop Dog and Bloodhound Gang. He was a charming and likeable character with natural comedic talents. I think I just liked him because he kept looking over and telling me how much he liked the 'lovely South African'. I’d definitely recommend seeing Bob the Slayer’s show should he be in your town.

Next on the show list was a proudly South African show called The Epicene Butcher and OtherStories for Consenting Adults. I couldn't be more proud of these two South African ladies who absolutely rocked the show! The performance is inspired by a traditional Japanese form of storytelling,  but the director, Jemma Khan, transformed it into something that adults can enjoy. A simple set with (what actually looked like a clothes horse) a cardboard box and some A2 cardboard slides with original art work used to aid the story telling. Several stories were told, all just as funny, clever or interesting as the next. There was even a slightly raunchy one where the story teller fakes an orgasm telling the story of a day dreaming man thinking of having sex with a woman.

The story teller was assisted by ‘Chalk Girl’ – a cheeky girl dressed in a short skirted outfit and a Japanese bob wig who helped with the transitions between stories.

I was completely blown away by the show. A captivating, unique and slightly provocative performance that should not be missed. Thanks for doing our country proud out there - a truly wonderful show!

I’ll close off this week’s blog piece with the final show we watched – 'Asking for It'. A one woman stand-up making jokes about men taking advantage of women. If you’ve heard of Jimmy Carr you’ll know that rape jokes are not something new to the comedic world. Having them told by a woman, however is something I haven’t heard of before. It’s a refreshing performance making light of something negative and Adrianna was totally charming, charismatic and held the audience's attention throughout the performance. One thing I have yet to mention is that she did the show completely bottomless. In between jokes, the lights turned off and images of men were projected onto her hoo-hoo, where her Brazilian cut either fashioned as hair or a beard.

All in all a fantastic performance and a great night out in Scotland that ended with a proposal from a local...